Change is good, except when it's not

I haven't watched the recent Fame remake, but I love this bit from the trailer:

"Everything you want to change about yourself, all the parts of yourself that you keep secret, it's your power. It's who you are."

Nice idea. Might be true, too. Even a part of yourself that's naughty might be powerful in a different context. That's what Pierre Berton said about bank robber Roger Caron who escaped from prison or jail 13 times--that in another context, like a concentration camp, he might have been a hero.

Rrrromance! Pat Monahan - Her Eyes

If you're like me (and I know I am) one of the greatest pick-me-ups on earth is music. It's a great antidote to low confidence, fear, depression, discouragement, etc. So I think I'll post music for the next few Mondays... in case you need a fresh start to your week.

I'm pretty sure I'm not alone in this sentiment--the comments on author Lani Diane Rich's (Lucy March) blog are always full of song recommendations. Like this one.

"She's not afraid, she just likes to use a night light."

What is style? According to Prince...

I have to post this while it's still up on youtube.

Style is not lusting after someone because they're cool
Style is loving yourself 'til everyone else does 2

Jessica Simpson - Rewarded for grace under fire

Jessica Simpson was recently awarded a Gracie. The awards celebrate and honor "programming created for women, by women and about women, as well as individuals who have made exemplary contributions to the industry."



According to US:

The Gracies honored Simpson for her strength and entrepreneurial endeavors in the face of adversity and public scrutiny. Earlier in her speech, Simpson quipped, "I'm not used to people talking so nice about me."

I support this award. I think Jessica S is a class act.

More bad photoshop

Jezebel has more insane photoshopping on their site--this time courtesy of Ann Taylor. Click the Gumby-esque picture below.

Belle au naturel - Beauty without makeup? Est-ce possible?

At the grocery line recently I noticed an interesting headline/cover story for Elle Quebec: "Beautiful au naturel." In support of a TV program about 4 women obsessed with makeup who challenged themselves to be photographed without makeup or touch ups, Elle ran a series of photographs of well-known women without makeup.

We don't even have a catchy way of saying "without make-up" in English, do we? In French it rhymes with "beautiful" as well as with "she." Hence the catchy title of the show:

Elle est belle au naturel.

They also had a "wear no makeup" day on May 11th. That would be a fun thing to promote in future. Well to be fair, people like me who wear makeup not more than once per year would probably have to wear makeup that day, as all our other friends went without--so that the suffering would be equal.

In future I'll try to post some of the quotes by the women photographed for the magazine. For the moment, their website shows photos of some of the Elle staffers, and their comments. (Excuse my poor translation abilities.)

"Il fait maintenant tellement partie de ma vie que j'ai du mal à me regarder le visage nu. J'en porte très peu, mais sortir sans cache-cernes est impensable pour moi. Toutes mes vieilles insécurités ressurgissent. À 30 ans passés, je réalise que même si je me sens plus à l'aise dans ma peau et que je suis fière de tout ce que j'ai accompli, je n'arrive toujours pas à me regarder avec indulgence. Je crois que derrière cette obsession d'être maquillée en tout temps se cache une volonté de contrôler son image et de se protéger contre le jugement des autres."


"It's so much a part of my life now, I have trouble looking at my bare face. I wear very little, but going out without concealer is unthinkable for me. All my old insecurities resurface. With 30 years passed, I realize that even if I feel easier in my skin and I'm proud of all I've accomplished, I can't look at myself with leniency. I think that behind this obsession with being made up at all times hides a desire to control your image and to protect yourself from the judgments of others."

Don't it make you wanna dance? - Fleetwood Mac Edition

Everyone in this band always looks like they're having a good time (these days) except Christine McVie. ...Must be why she left. Well, don't let that stop you from enjoying it.

Don't Stop

Impractically lovely

Well if you're going to a fashion event -- the opening of the Met's "American Woman: Fashioning the National Identity" -- then please, wear a dress like this. Something totally impractical. Something that looks like a camouflaged jellyfish is following you around. Something you'd see in a museum display!

[Credit: Hiroko Masuike for the New York Times]
See the rest of the gallery here.

Put a ring on a 9 year old? I don't think so.

Wow. Um. Awesome dancing, but why would you put your kid in these clothes? And there's a couple dance moves in there that could be taken out of the routine.

It's weird the way the sexualization of children has gone from being something subtle, to being so overt.

I also find weird all the comments by people saying: "It's only sexual cause you perverts see it that way!" They don't see anything inherently wrong with the routine and costume, they think it's all in our dirty minds.



Bruce Cockburn was right--that what we consider "normal" gets worse. Okay, not in all areas. I'm glad homosexuality is becoming something we consider "normal", as well as women's equality, etc. But when it comes to the sexuality of children, I think he was bang on.

"Nothing domestic about it"

I first heard Tarrus Riley on CBC Radio--he's sooo good. And I love this song, about abuse. Partly because it's well-written, emotionally sung, but also because reggae/dancehall (probably more the latter) music doesn't have the best history with respectful songs about women.



The ending of the video, where he saves her from her abuser, is unrealistic... but the understandable fantasy of many of us, male and female.

Not sure that this topic ties into the theme of this blog, other than... there are a lot uglier things in this world than socks with sandals.

____
A much angrier song on this theme - The Dresden Dolls' "Delilah." Maybe not the most emotionally mature take on abuse, but no one's ever accused Amanda Palmer of being emotionally mature. It is emotional, though, and again--might be close to how I'd feel if a friend of mine kept going back to someone who beat her.

(This video may not stay up long--the fact that no one's posted the album version on youtube makes me suspect it gets taken down. But the live versions are really hard to understand.)

he's gonna beat you like a pillow
you schizos never learn
and if you take him home
you'll get what you deserve

so don't cry delilah
you're still alive delilah
you need a ride delilah?
let's see how fast this thing can go.....

Does your face require correction?

My friend Swissgirl sent this email to me and another friend:

I have a tiny dark spot near my eye and I think it always makes me look like I smudged my eye shadow. I thought it’s easy enough to fix since there is a myriad of products out there, but I don’t want to by something with “CORRECTION” or “REPAIR” in the title on principle! So aggravating. I’m not broken!!! Just want to lighten a spot!!! GRRRRRR

This was her other friend's vair amusant reply:

You’re probably a victim of ‘epidermal disorganization’.

Later Swissgirl settled on this product:



Why this product, as opposed to the many others? I believe Swissgirl's Other Friend correctly guessed why:


What girl can resist a swirly??

Don't it make you wanna dance? - Go! Team Edition

Ladyflash

I Am the Boob Decider!

I just came across a fashion-trend blog which I like better than most I've come across--it's called The Gloss. They seem to strike a good balance between "squee! pretty thing!" and "let's criticize and trash everyone!"

For example, their criticism of The Huffington Post for their faux-boob run-down:

The Huffington Post has a piece up that asks readers which celebrities’ faux racks are tasteful, and which are tasteless. ... But you know what? I call bullshit on this. If you don’t like plastic surgery, that’s one thing. But you can’t go around being all, “your silicone is good, and yours is bad! I am the boob job decider!”

Bravo.

The sexy route to power

So speaking of sex as a weapon (see yesterday)...

I hear it a lot, this idea that the most powerful thing women have is their sexuality--that women can use their sexuality to get things from men, and that makes them more powerful than men.

I do agree that sex can give you some power, and some types of power. In The Days When men held most of the power, this might be one of the few ways to wrest power away.

But my one problem with the idea is that I think that power is still secondary to actually having the primary power yourself. You know, enough power that a man will try to take it from YOU with sex. I don't think it's enough to settle for Sexual Power, or a type of power that only works in conjunction with an already-powerful male. I disagree with calling this the primary means through which women can get power.

Do you want to be Alexis Carrington, or Blake? Sue-Ellen or JR? Okay, I don't want to be Blake or JR, but you know what I mean. Do you want to be Monica Lewinsky or Bill Clinton? Let's at least create conditions where we realistically have the choice.

[Pictured above: Poison Ivy from the horrible Batman movie. Her primary power was to make men fight over her.]

Stop using sex as a weapon... at least not allll the time

I was looking at pictures of Kim Carnes the other day, and I realized that in the 80s (when I was in my teens) the image of women in music wasn't overwhelmingly one of "sex." At least, not sex in the bare-skinned way, or the Madonna "boy toy" way.

And one of the most sexy-clothes-wearing was 50 years old.

I don't have anything against the sex kitten look, but I get the impression it's much more expected these days than it used to be. I think it's harder to launch a career without baring a lot of skin. Not impossible, just harder.

Ah well, video did kill the radio star.

Kim Carnes

Katrina & the Waves

Joan Jett

Stevie Nicks


Amazulu

Bonnie Tyler

Annie Lennox

Melissa Etheridge

Of course, one of these women turned completely to the supa-sex look in the 90s...

But in one rare case a woman went from sex kitten to "invincible / stop using sex as a weapon" image (Pat Benatar).

And in groups of women, you had a choice!

Klymaxx

Heart

The Bangles

The Pointer Sisters

The Go-Go's


Bananarama

Don't it make you wanna dance? - Diana Ross Edition

There are few better songs for making you feel good than Diana Ross' "I'm Coming Out."

And the intro is one of the best parts. It starts out all hesitant and lacking in confidence, and then it finally throws open the door and comes out of the closet!

Ugly on the inside

My dad sent me this link--apparently there's a procedure now to remove a small amount of fat using ultrasound waves. It made the cover of Oprah's latest magazine, which naturally prompted a bunch of negative comments about Oprah like this one:

Oprah, Please try this fat removal system. You really need to before it's to late and then you can work on your face later. They can perform miracle's these day's.

I don't have a problem with people criticizing Oprah, or anyone else. It's healthy. And when the comments are nasty, well, with someone as famous as Oprah it won't affect her--I doubt she has the time or inclination to google herself and read every last word being said against her!

But I do wonder what such comments do to the people commenting. Just as you are what you eat, you are what you think as well. So, like... have some respect for yourself and stop spewing garbage out of your brain.

Books for overeaters

So the reader reviews on amazon are in for Geneen Roth's Women, Food and God -- popular right now because Oprah's been promoting it.


It seems the worst of the reviews is (a) if you were most interested in the God part, you'll be disappointed, cause it's basically atheist; (b) sometimes a hard read ("ethereal" language.)

Whenever you read these reviews you get directed to other books that people liked better, so I soon found myself jumping from book to book about overeating, and came across this lovely tome. Here's what the author promotes (quoted from a 1-star review):

Apparently the solution to food addiction is to make it so unpalatable that you dare not overeat. I think if it was legal for her to do so, Sheppard would suggest permanent IV drips as a solution. According to this book, for the rest of your life, you will never eat sugar again. Not just no adding sugar or not going overboard on sugar. Everything must be sugar free. No salad dressing with sugar. No luncheon meat with sugar anywhere on the label. Nada. Nothing. Oh, and no chocolate either. Ever. Not even if it's sugar free. No desserts of any kind. Oh, and did I mention no fat and no refined flour products. So you can cross off pasta, bread, cooking oils, and even soy sauce off the menu.

Nice.

Step right up, get your diet pills here!

Who is buying diet pills off of sketchy online ebay type sites?? 'Tis madness.

Beauty in the World - Macy Gray

It's nice to see Macy Gray still doing her thing.

"Notice the blue skies

Notice the butterflies
Notice me!
...Cause there is beauty in the world."

Lookin' Good - at the movies

I seem to have given myself Monday off. Ah well, on to Tuesday...

A teenie version of Beauty and the Beast. That's my favourite fairy tale, but I'm not sure this movie looks particularly good. It looks watch-on-tv good. All depends on how whiny the Beast is, and how boring Beauty is. I like the witch character, though.